I’m as bored as an Amish electrician.
Ontario has banned groups larger than 5.
If you’re a family of 6, you’re all about to find out who’s the least favorite!
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The longer this goes on, the harder it will be to return to a society where pants and bras are required!
Happy hour is starting earlier and earlier.
If this keeps up, I’ll be pouring wine in my cereal!
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Today’s Weather? Room temperature
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30 Days Hath September, April, June and November All the rest have 31 … except March which had 8000
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Smoking pot and skipping school had me in trouble constantly.
Now weed's legal and schools closed … damn kids are livin’ the dream!
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This is stupid. I just tried to make my own hand sanitizer and it came out as a rum & coke!
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If you get an email with the subject “Knock Knock”, don’t open it.
It’s a Jehovah Witness working from home
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After a few days of not going out, I saw someone I knew walking by on the sidewalk outside.
I immediately ran to the window and started yelling to them.
Now I understand dogs.
~~~~~
Day 8 of social isolation and it’s looking like Vegas in my house:
We’re losing money by the minute.
Cocktails are acceptable at any hour.
Nobody knows what time it is.
***Official Joke Thread***
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- Master Standardshifter
- Posts: 11612
- Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2009 3:44 pm
- Cars: '08 Jeep Liberty
- Location: Greater Detroit Area
Re: ***Official Joke Thread***
'08 Jeep Liberty 6-Speed MT - "Last of the Mohicans"
-
- Master Standardshifter
- Posts: 11612
- Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2009 3:44 pm
- Cars: '08 Jeep Liberty
- Location: Greater Detroit Area
Re: ***Official Joke Thread***
As of 1 May, 1127 Depositors have died nationwide while attempting to withdraw funds.
President's Coronavirus Team to develop bank guard training program.
'08 Jeep Liberty 6-Speed MT - "Last of the Mohicans"